Around this time every year, when we're trying to squeeze out the last of the August rays before school opens and businesses ramp back up to full speed, the Farmers' Almanac comes out with the same mundane prediction that it's going to be a cold winter with a lot of snow.
Ya know what? Who cares?
December, January and February are usually cold. It's winter. And if there's precipitation, it's usually snow.
So I pull up to the Dunkin' Donuts drive-thru the other morning to buy some donuts, muffins and bagels for my family, who was visiting for the weekend (there is no walk-in option).
Here's the exchange:
Me: "I'd like to order four muffins. What kind do you have?"
DD employee: "Blueberry, corn and chocolate chip."
Me: "OK, I'll have three blueberry and one corn."
DD employee: "Would you like any coffee?"
Me: "No, but I'll also have..."
DD employee: "Please drive up."
Me: "I'm still ordering."
DD employee: "Go ahead."
Me: "I'll have five bagels and a dozen donuts. Just give me a mix on the donuts."
So I drive up, pay for my muffins, bagels and donuts and pull over to the side, just to check to see if they got it right. I open the box of donuts and find that there are 12 variations of chocolate donuts — double chocolate, Boston cream, chocolate frosted and chocolate sprinkled.
Me, cutting off a few cars to get back to the window: "Um, I asked for a mix and I got a box of chocolates."
DD employee, turning to someone in the back room: "Hmm. Lester, he asked for a mix."
Lester (apparently, the guy who selected my donut mix): "I gave him a mix."
DD employee: "See, these look like mostly chocolate."
Lester: "Well I was just trying to get rid of the donuts we have a lot of."
Finally, I get a mix (jelly and plain, what a concept) and drive away.