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December 01, 2003


Well said. Most people violate at least one of these.

excellent stuff. Only 5 weeks 'til my next flight, and I hope that I encounter no offenders.

Oh, and another rule, if I recline my seat, I do it because my personal space is limited, and I am searching for a bit of comfort. If you're sitting behind me, I'll have checked you're not all legs or a kid, so please don't ask me to sit up! I don't know you, and I am not going to sacrifice my new found comfort for a complete stranger who is rude enough to bark orders at me, also don't use 'body language' I put it back so you have significant space, don't kick my backside, I know you like your nose un-broken, I prefere my spine that way.

That's a good one. I've actually had people ask me not to tilt my seat back while I'm in a middle seat on a United flight. Yeah, right.

Hey Mudder...if'n yer tip yer dead ass seat back onna flite less than two hours in duration you'll getta boot up yer ass AND a busted schnozz...do yer drive down the highway lyin' on yer back?

i had a woman yell at me for tilting my seat back because her son needed to sleep on her lap.She viciously shoved my seat back up after i kindly explained to her that its an eight hour flight and we all need to sleep. Needless to say I was way to shocked to react the way I should have,but I didnt want to start a fight

you cry babies, what do you own the fucking airline? It's ass holes like you that stare at everyone like your the best thing that ever stepped on the plane. Why don't you take your pussy ass to the airlines with your concerns instead of other people who have the right to be just as comfortable as you, or quit being a cheap ass and fly a bigger jet

That seat-tilt problem... sigh. Each of our personal space begins where the seat in front of us ends. It ends where our seat reclines. It's a variable space, but accept it.

I once had a woman shove my seat forward, then placed her feet on the back to keep from tilting back. The guy in the next seat called the flight attendant who quiet and calmly explained that I have a right to recline my seat, and she had to accept it. Good thing. We were about to come to blows.

Crazy up there in the sky, isn't it?

You missed my personal in-flight antagonist: taking your shoes off during the flight. Leave them on! I don't want to smell your feet.

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The seat back thing. In 98, from Rio to Iguassu falls, A-hole jock behind me had knee in seat. I was a bit undiplomatic, said "I paid had the right to recline." "He told his friend, "I'd do it if he asked nicely." I found an empty seat next to him to recline in. "There ya go" he said. when I struggled at one point "I'll have to take your head off" I should have called stewardess spilled coffee on him whatever. I tried to poke a kid's eye out with a pencil in high school cuz HE wouldnt leave me alone either.

I'm not through yet and I'm in my forties. Bastards lucky he's alive with his site.

Nobody...nobody...has to release his or her seatback for a short, daytime flight. Please have the courtesy to ask the person behind you, "May I release my seatback." I'd say yes even if I didnt' like it, but really resent the jerks who release the seatback right after beverages are dispensed. It's rude.

Two more annoyances. The guy who clipped his nails, sending his discharged nails into my lap. And the teenager who insisted on talking with his sister, who was across the aisle and behind. I finally asked him to stop.

Roger - nail-clipping? That's bad. You'd think no one would even consider attempting this on a plane.

I must add the most annoying thing I have just suffered through: cards. I just returned from a night flight where this lady was shuffling and cutting cards right in my ear all night. As if shuffling wasn't bad enough, she would cut the deck at least 4 times per deal. Please leaving your stinking cards at home next time !!

I must add the most annoying thing I have just suffered through: cards. I just returned from a night flight where this lady was shuffling and cutting cards right in my ear all night. As if shuffling wasn't bad enough, she would cut the deck at least 4 times per deal. Please leaving your stinking cards at home next time !!

I know this might rub some folks the wrong way...but I am not interested in switching seats with you. I buy my tickets many months in advance and carefully pick out the seat I want. You can live without your loved one for a few hours. Heck, they might even welcome a chance to be away from you for a few hours if you are that smothering. Just because I am single does not give couples inherent rights over my chosen seat.

Here's a few I would like to add:
11) If I'm at a window seat, someone else is at the aisle and you're stuck in the middle...take the arm rests. I can at least lean over and I will still be fairly comfortable. I hate middle seats and do sometimes get stuck in them. Don't be a jerk and hog the whole damn arm rest. Have a tiny bit of compasion.
12) Addition to number 10. This one drives me totally crazy every frickin time! Why must you be in such a hurry? Why must you grab your bags so quickly? Why must you stand up once that damn seatbelt light goes off? And to top it all off, half the time we're on the tarmack!!!! A bus will take us to the terminal!!!! Sit the F@&k down. A plane will probably empty much quicker when we do it one row at a time. I normally sit and wait until 4-5 rows behind me have gone by. There'll always be some jerk back there that'll block the way and allow me an easy, relaxed exit.
13) Why must you turn your phones on once the damn no seatbelt sign goes off at the gate? Is it really that important? Damn - half the plane sounds like PEEP PEEP PEEP when you turn those things on. Just wait! And god forbid, don't call someone and tell them "hey, we just landed". No shit??? There probably standing in the terminal and can see it on the screen!!!!

laptops....I get that you are busy...I admire your work ethic...HOWEVER when you are in coach and you type with your ELBOWS OUT...rude
and if you are going to look at porn in a public place (which I don't suggest to begin with) get a privacy screen.

I am a flight attendant....have been for 23 years and I have seen it, smelled it, and heard it all. The toenail clippings, the at-your-seat sex under a blanket, using a barf bag as a urinal, a diaper full of poop placed on top of my beverage cart during a service, the seat back pocket used as a spitoon by a tobacco chewer, the perv reading a porn magazine next to an unaccompanied child, the farters, the drunks, the obnoxious, married businessmen that think you'll take them to your layover hotel for a flight 'debriefing'. All I can say is that the plane is our office, our home-away-from home....so please have some respect for us and your fellow passengers. Don't check your brains and your manners when you check your bags at the curb. And please know that our purpose on board is to save your a**, not kiss it....as proven by the USAir flight attendants that helped save 150 passengers in the Hudson River last month.

Mommy in the Sky - thanks for your thoughtful post. All great points.

- Dan

I absolutely agree with all of these posts. Had my very first flight last October (from Europe to America and back, alone I might add, and I am basically still a kid) so I was very, very nervous. There was one certain incident among others that really pissed me off bad. There was a stupid kid who kept punching the seat I was in from behind, and it almost got to the point where I was about to turn around and politely ask him to .Stop.Punching.The.Effing.Seat. He kept doing it throughout the 9-hour flight. I mean c'mon, is that really necessary? And is it okay to do so by any means? Where's the parents when it comes to this kind of stuff?

Not a smart thing to kick and punch the seat when you got a grumpy teenager in front of you.

Rule 11: burn the mother fucker.

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I HATE people that sit behind me with a large newspaper. It goes from annoying, to infuriating then enraging very quickly when the hair on the back of my head is constantly being rustled by some JO's newspaper.

When you ask them to stop and they won't, they are begging for a fight.

I can understand why people get violent on planes. People can be inconsiderate jerks and do stuff they ordinarily wouldn't do, like act like an 11 year old on a long road trip that pokes and pinches his little brother.

Lucky for me, there were lots of open seats. I complained to the stewardess and she moved me.

Number 4's definitely a prime source of frustration. Any concentration or focus (or lack thereof) in trying to relax or sleep gets broken whenever there's a shuffling of movement to go to the bathroom. It can get pretty annoying, but I suppose you have to eventually look towards number 10 for inner peace in the plane.

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