Steel Kaleidoscopes

Water is Wonderful

There's nothing like a bath to beat the heat.

Keith Foulke

Keith Foulke is in dire need of caffeine.

As the saying goes, "coffee is for closers" (meant in the sales vernacular but still relevant), and Foulke is hardly closing the deal these days.

Foulke, one of the poster children of the Red Sox' 2004 championship season, seems to have lost his pizazz. Last night's debacle was just one of many bad performances this season, although it may have been the ugliest.

So what does Terry Francona do?

Mike Timlin is an option. So is Bronson Arroyo. He may even consider Curt Schilling, once he's back. What Francona surely needs to do is give Foulke a break.

Everyone needs a little time off now and then. Especially when things aren't going so well. Doesn't matter if you're a highly paid Major League Baseball pitcher or you work in a mail room. A break can be the pause that refreshes.

If Foulke has indeed lost his skills, Francona and pitching coach Dave Wallace should recognize this and transition him out of the closer role. A slumping outfielder doesn't hurt the team. A slumping closer does. It's a key position that makes all the difference in whether or not you win that game.

Bo Bice Update

In case you missed it, Bo Bice last week signed a recording contract with RCA Records. His first single, "Inside Your Heaven" was recently released with "Vehicle" on the B-side.

Bon Jovi's Richie Sambora plays guitar on "Vehicle." Bo's debut album is scheduled to be released this fall.

The American Idol runner-up tells Rolling Stone he's glad he didn't win American Idol because he felt his ability to influence the record would have been compromised.

Bo's biggest concern these days is whether to have his replica 1967 Mustang painted gun-metal gray or bright red with black racing stripes.

Meanwhile, if you're wondering about the power of American Idol, the Billboard Top 50 is sprinkled with familiar names, starting with Carrie Underwood with the No. 1 song in the country with "Inside Your Heaven."

Kelly Clarkson has hits at Nos. 6, 12 and 42, while Fantasia checks in at No. 48.

Yes, indeed, they have "raised their game."

(Photo courtesy of American Idol Watch.)

The New LPGA

Blink, and you have to ask: When did the LPGA get hip?

As a former sportswriter, I covered the annual LPGA golf tourney when it made its swing through New England, following around the likes of Dottie Pepper, Nancy Lopez and Laura Davies.

These were older, mature women golfers, extremely talented but not the most physically fit athletes. They could strike the ball, but there was no rock 'n' roll party here. It was a Kenny G kind of event.

Fast-forward to 2005 and the LPGA landscape has changed. There's Annika Sorenstam, the LPGA's version of Tiger Woods, and several young players who spend more time on the leader board than they do in high school.

Takes yesterday's U.S. Women's Open final round at the foot of the Rockie Mountains.

Morgan Pressel, just 17, and Brittany Lang, 19, both amateurs, played so well that they tied for second, behind 23-year-old winner Birdie Kim. Think about that for a minute. Two amateurs tying for second in a major golf championship.

Paula Creamer, 18, and Young Ju, 21, contended through three rounds. Then there's Michelle Wie,  just 15, the golf prodigy who most experts think will dominate this tour and perhaps surpass Sorenstam as the next big thing.

It's a different playing field, this LPGA. With an infusion of youth, talented and fit, women's golf just may see its ratings soar.

These girls can play.

Baking in Bolton

Now, this is what I call summer.

Heat and humidity, with plenty of sunshine.

The forecast calls for more of the same.

Makes all those frigid winter days worthwhile.

Retrospective Relevance

Turn around, bright eyes.

Turn around.

- Bonnie Tyler, 1983

Displaced Healthcare Providers

Pediatricians at a bingo tournament.

Podiatrists at arm's length.

Optometrists within earshot.

Chiropractors in gut-wrenching situations.

Top 100 Movie Quotes

So the American Film Institute releases its Top 100 Movie Quotes. This, of course, generates lots of discussion. And debate.

While I agree with many of these, here are what I think are the 20 most notable omissions:

1. "But this one goes up to 11" -- Christopher Guest in "This is Spinal Tap"

2. "We're on a mission from God" -- Dan Akroyd in "The Blues Brothers"

3. "I get to be on top" -- Tom Hanks in "Big"

4. "If anyone orders Merlot, I'm leaving.  I am not drinking any f***king Merlot!" -- Paul Giamatti in "Sideways"

5. "Coffee is for Closers" -- Alec Baldwin in "Glengarry Glen Ross"

6. "Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue" -- Lloyd Bridges in "Airplane!"

7. "Forget about it" -- Johnny Depp in "Donnie Brasco"

8. "Kmart sucks" -- Dustin Hoffman in "Rain Man"

9. "Ditto" -- Patrick Swayze in "Ghost"

10. "So you were havin' sex with the little feller then" -- Frances McDormand in "Fargo"

11. "Well, all-righty then" -- Jim Carrey in "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective"

12. "How do you like them apples?" -- Matt Damon in "Good Will Hunting"

13. "Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son" -- John Vernon in "Animal House"

14. "Yeah, baby" -- Mike Myers in "Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery"

15. "Shut the f**k up, Donny" -- John Goodman in "The Big Lebowski"

16. "Excellent!" -- Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter in "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure"

17. "You jumped out of a plane for me!" -  Sarah Jessica Parker in "Honeymoon in Vegas"

18. "Now get your -- what was that you called it? ... yes, your bony ass out of my sight" -- Philip Bosco in "Working Girl"

19. "Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" -- Nathan Lane in "The Birdcage"

20. "I'm Batman" -- Michael Keaton in "Batman"

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Related links:
Top 100 Movies of All Time
Top 10 Memorable Movie Scenes

Summer, 1973

Choosing sides for the national pastime, with just enough players for left field, shortstop and first base. You pitch to your own team, then grab a bat.

The bat is heavy from being left in the rain, its handle swaddled in black duct tape. But when that pitch arrives, the weathered yet official American League baseball signals that the game is on.

And when the game is over, usually after nine summer-sweat innings unless the score is out of hand, we swig down a Dr. Pepper, tuck a grape Big Buddy wad in our cheek and head to the water.

Carrying a radio that's playing Stealers Wheel's "Stuck in the Middle With You," we navigate our Schwinns against the grain of light traffic. Soon, we're swinging from a thick, taut rope, horse-whispering over the lazy water, splashing through the still surface, the dirt from the slide into third dissolving around us.

After the swim and a few lengthy battles with horse flies, we once again choose up sides. When you're 13, there's no better feeling than the top of the first.

Live Music in Cambridge

If you've got nothing better to do tonight on the longest day of the year, the Plough & Stars in Cambridge features some good live music. Problem is, rumor has it the intimate club is shutting its doors.

Reverb Joe was scheduled to take the stage at 8:30 p.m., playing a '60s blues kind of thang. Word is that these guys are pretty good. Since this won't be happening, another option is to check out Electrosocial with Blue Ribbon at the Middle East.

The Middle East is a Central Square institution. The doors will open. Promise.